Sam’s Rant – Coffee Shops

21 01 2011

I remember a time when Coffee was easier to buy, I remember a time when a slice of cake did not cost £5.00, I remember a time when there was no Coffee Shops.

OK, I don’t drink tea or coffee but I do drink Hot Chocolate and Milkshakes. When I was younger there was no coffee shops, ok there were but they were completely different to what they are now. Coffee Shops were a place where you bought supplies to make coffee at home. I remember buying different kinds of coffee for my Mam for a Christmas or Birthday Present.

When I was younger there was no Starbuck’s, Costa, Nero or Esquires. There was no Coffee Shops, there was Cafe’s. at a cafe you could buy all sorts; tea, coffee, cappuccino, hot chocolate, milkshake’s and to go with your choice of drink you could have something to eat like a sandwich or a piece of cake. It was also cheaper back then; it did not cost so much money to have something to eat or drink.

It was easier to choose what you wanted to drink because there was not 50 kinds of coffee to choose from. It was just Coffee, you asked for a coffee and they would ask if you wanted a black coffee  or white coffee. it was that simple, now you have tall, flat, thin, fat and skyscraper. In Starbucks the smallest you can have is a tall, I want a small drink, small. I don’t want something as big as King Kong. In the TV Series Reggie Perrin (Very Funny) he says he has not bought a coffee in 15 years because he can’t decide what kind of coffee to have. What exactly is a caramel Macchiato. What is so Flat about a Flat White, it’s in a cup which means it is not flat, it’s in a small cup, maybe they should have called it a small white, if it was a flat white it would be on the plate, that’s flat, maybe one of those square plates, they are really flat. Why can’t you ask for a coffee, just a coffee, it would be much easier, Tea, Coffee, Cappuccino, Hot Chocolate or Milkshake. That however brings me onto 2 points I am going to mention, Hot Chocolate at a coffee shop is not a proper Hot Chocolate and the milkshakes are not proper milkshakes.

I have talked about the Hot Chocolate before:

“A Hot Chocolate should taste of Chocolate, it’s called Hot Chocolate, it says it in the title, Chocolate that is Hot. If you don’t understand that it is a Drink made of Chocolate Heated up and put in a Mug and Drunk but more importantly the key element that it is Chocolate that is Hot I don’t know why you are drinking it, Did you expect a Smoothie (I have not done a Rant in Ages). Anyway; a Hot Chocolate should taste of Chocolate and it should be Hot, it’s a Hot Chocolate. For this (Clearly Highlighted) ingredient it should be Actual Chocolate. Most mainstream places that provide Hot Chocolate have a Hot Chocolate that tastes like Processed Essence of Chocolate that doesn’t really taste all that much like Chocolate; it needs to taste like Hot Chocolate.”

The Milkshakes are not proper milkshakes. Milkshakes are made of Milk and sometimes Ice Cream. Coffee Shops supply Milkshakes with milk and water. OK it’s crushed ice but it’s more of an Ice Shake than a milkshake, If I Want a Milkshake I want a Milkshake not an Iceshake. There is a nice place in Lancaster called Juicafe where you can get a proper Milkshake, You can also get Cake Shake’s where you have a cake mixed into a milkshake. I do like the Two-Twisted Milkshake’s they sell at VUE Cinema. It is 2 Ben and Jerry’s Ice Cream Flavours mixed together, but every time you ask for one the Staff at the Cinema have no idea what you are talking about.

The Cake’s are another issue, I like Cake and so I would like to eat a Cake with my Drink. There is one major problem and it involves the drink’s aswell. It cost’s too much Money, It should not cost £4.50 for a slice of cake that I could buy at Greggs for less than £1, I could almost buy the whole cake for £4.50. A Coffee should cost less than £2.00 at least, not more than £3.00. Why can’t I buy something cheap.

Coffee Shop’s are easier to find than Cafe’s but I still prefer Cafe’s. There is one thing I like about Coffee Shop’s, they have soft Seats.

Why does it have to be so difficult to buy drink’s at a coffee shop, just keep it simple; Tea, Coffee, Cappuccino, Hot Chocolate and Milkshake with a nice cheap piece of Cake to go with it.





2 responses

8 02 2011
jennie dees

I really enjoyed this blog post

19 09 2011



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